Step 57 - Resiliency .  "Having a rough morning?  Place your hand over your heart.  Feel it?
That's called purpose.  YOU are alive for a reason - don't give up."  ANON

The following fifteen statetements written by E.H. Grotberg I HAVE,  I AM,  I CAN,  is a resource used in parenting courses.  The statements assist parents to provide, for their children, positive and anxiety reducing critical thinking skills.  Equally, for adults, the statements are a helpful guide to understanding what it is we need to work on within ourselves to overcome adverse and difficult situations and re-gain or affirm resiliency.

I HAVE

  • People around me I trust and who love me, no matter what
  • People who set limits for me so I know when to stop before there is danger or trouble
  • People who show me how to do things right by the way they do things
  • People who want me to learn to do things on my own
  • People who can help me when I am sick, in danger or need to learn
I AM

  • A person people can like and love
  • Glad to do things for others and show my concern
  • Respectful of myself and others
  • Willing to be resposible for what I do
  • Sure things will be alright
I CAN

  • Talk to others about things that frighten me or bother me
  • Find ways to solve problems I face
  • Control myslef when I feel like doing something not right or dangerous
  • Figure out when it is a good time to talk to someone or to take action
  • Find someone to help me when I need it
Exercise:

Review the list and examine carefully which of them you do not believe or which of them you have conflicting messages about.

For example "I can talk to others about things that frighten me or bother me."  If your past experience has been an unsympathetic, non empathic or a critical listening ear, you will feel conflicted about asking for help.  Your thoughts will tell you it is not safe to ask for help.  To change these messages try and source where they first came from and why you believed them.  Recognize that this situation now is not the same as it once was.  Try to reframe the story you keep telling yourself.  (for more on this read or watch the author Brene Brown -  http://www.brenebrown.com/books/)

Successes.....
Managing my work and professional commitments
Creative solutions for practical problems
Giving myself a break

Challenges.....
Containing and managing the urge to bury my head in the sand
Working with families who are in desperate situations and feeling overwhelmed - remembering they are not MY problems

Namas Day





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